So after thinking about it for a few minutes I realized, maybe I am not reviewing the right kinds of things. Ski School is a 20 year old movie, And Tuf Voyaging is old enough to rent a car in Korea. Today I am going to review a few products that I recently got my hands on. While I am not getting paid for any of these reviews, I would like this to act as my audition for companies looking for a blogger to shill for them. My specialty is book reviews so lets start there, then move on to a product review.
Book Review:
The Guinea Pig Diaries by is a new book by A.J. Jacobs, the author of Know-It-All and The Year of Living Biblically. A.J. Jacobs is a writer/editor for Esquire magazine and despite working for "Playboy Without the Tits Magazine", he seems like a pretty decent guy. I have read two of his other books and have thoroughly enjoyed them. The Guinea Pig Diaries is not as good as Know-It-All or The Year of Living Biblically but that doesn't mean it's not a good book. In fact, if I had to describe it, I would call it the ballinest most gangsta book I have read all year. A.J. is a proponent of what he calls "Participatory Journalism." In this type of Journalism the author takes part in the activity he or she is writing about. In A.J. Jacobs case it takes the form of a series of bizarre experiments. When A.J. wanted to learn about religious peoples mindset, he spent a year trying to follow every single law in the bible. Like a true thug A.J. jumps in feet first and doesn't give a shit about anything.
His books alternate between hilarious, educational and strangely sweet. The Guinea Pig Diaries is different from his previous books because instead of focusing on one Sisyphean task for an entire year, he spends the year on a series of smaller challenges. For one month he outsources every aspect of his life to India. During another month he tries to be the perfect husband, following the every recommendation and command of his wife. In yet another month he tries to live life by the rules of etiquette that George Washington wrote down way back when.
The only thing I was disappointed by was that many of these stories started out as Esquire articles and appear in the book largely unchanged. Why did I just buy a new hardback book when I could have read the articles in "Maxim for Fake Rich People?"
All in all though, The Guinea Pig Diaries is rad to the power of sick. I enjoyed it and I would recommend it to anybody familiar with Jacobs's work. If you are unfamiliar with Jacobs I would recommend reading The Year of Living Biblically 'cause that book is dank as hell and thug as shit.
Product Review:
Bigelow Cinnamon Stick Tea is the ballinest most gangsta tea on the planet. This shit is so delicious that when it hits your lips you will swear you just got smacked in the grill by Mike Tyson. When I drink Bigelow Cinnamon Stick Tea, and then I think about all that bunk ass black tea shit I have been drinking my whole life, I want to demand the hours of my life back.
Iced black tea is an unmistakable force of evil, most likely related to Monsanto or The Builderberg Group. Let me be clear. I am stating with authority that the makers of normal iced tea intentionally released a product that they know causes cancer and possibly miscarriages. The only way to stop the black tea menace is for everybody on earth to immediately switch over to using Bigelow Cinnamon Stick Tea at once.
Bigelow tea makes you irresistible to the ladies, makes you more efficient at work and I guarantee that you will get a promotion while getting a blow job if you drink this tea.
Note to Sponsors: So there you have it potential sponsors. If you like what I'm doing here I will gladly support your products. I am pretty much the awesomest guy ever, and when I talk, people listen. You want me on your side, and I want your sweet sweet money.
1 comment:
Excellent use of Sisyphean.
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